Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Beef: It's what's for dinner. . . or dessert?

Funny, huh? I don't mean to be too straight forward and crush feelings of others, but if you can't figure this one out (more or less) from the picture, you ought not be attempting much of anything in the kitchen.

The body is a cake ball, not the kind where you bake the cake and mix it with frosting and all that other stuff - although I imagine that would work -but is cake, baked into a ball, much like it sounds. I could have dipped it, but nestled the warm cake balls in a bed of powdered sugar and then dusted the tops. If you're really into marshmallows, like my sister, a gigantic marshmallow would work for the body instead of the cake ball.

The head and feet are marshmallows; the feet miniature marshmallows and the head regular size with the tip dipped in pink candy melts. The ears are pumpkin seeds that I harvested and roasted. The horns and tail are chow mien noodles. The spots, eyes and nostrils are dark chocolate because it is full of antioxidants and I didn't want to buy more candy melts.

Look, a whole herd.

One might ask, "For what purpose were these made?"

Uh, 'cause I can. . .I have a cake ball maker.

I'm using them in my honors English class as we read a story, supposedly full of symbolism, about a cow that escaped the slaughter house and ran back to the pasture to warn all the others of what was in store for them.

But perhaps you don't have that luxury of an entire class, a captive audience to hang on your every word. Don't be discouraged; I have some alternate uses.

I also plan to give one to my friend, a friend who texts me each morning to offer encouragement about getting out of bed and working out. It will say something like, "Thanks for helping me get up and get mooooving."

That is not all though, oh no, that is not all. . .
Suppose you are in a terrible relationship and you just don't know how to end it. What better way than an adorable cow confection and a note that reads, "I feel like it's time for me to moooove on."

The converse could also be true. If you are romantically involved with someone who is dragging his/her feet, wrap one up in a pretty pink bakery box with a note attached to the ribbon that says, "It's time to mooove forward."

Valentines day; "Have you herd? I've spotted you and want you to be mine."

Therapy: "There is more to life than black and white, allow color and shades of grey."

Birthday: "Have an udderly great birthday."

Thank you: "My udder thanks."

Just because: "You are udderly great."

Bi-lingual: "Mooochas Gracias"

Christmas: "Moooory Christmas"

Hanukkah: . . . Oh wait, it wouldn't work for Hanukkah, don't do that.

Thanksgiving: "Pumpkin pie, apple pie, pecan pie and cow pie; all parts of the first Thanksgiving." (and you could serve it with a chocolate pudding filled tart)

Invitation: "Hoof it on over to my place for a party."

Story hour: "High-tail it on over for a high tale."

See how the possibilities are endless?

I can also do pigs, but I forgot to take a picture.

When I was younger, we didn't have a barn. When cows got pneumonia, they needed a warm place to stay. For us that ended up being the bathtub. I told my students about that and one of them in particular was fascinated with the story, so I made her an ornament for her tree. It wasn't at all this romantic and/or cute, but no one wants a sickly calf in a manure filled tub hanging on their Christmas tree. 

1 comment: